It’s not a joke. You can see it in the first 15 minutes of a live remake. She usually flies like a superhero. He fights like a superhero and is treated like one. And that’s one of my problems with Mulan’s new movie.

What for? Because, uh… 1. It’s not Mulan and 2. This is a bad example for millions of young children all over the world. Let me explain. Since 1998, Mulan has been a clumsy, simple, sweet and naive young woman who could not even find a husband through a marriage broker. In short, she was every other girl in the world. She was cooperative, simple and clumsy, but that’s what we liked about her.

And don’t forget. Mulan was smart. She solved problems by thinking outside the box. She made an effort, trained hard, and through her determination, self-discipline, and hard work she became a fearless warrior. And in the end, she even abandoned her husband. She was a source of inspiration and a role model. And she wasn’t perfect when she did all this.

I don’t think so. The new Mulan is a special superhero, naturally gifted from an early age. Like I said, she fights like Jackie Chen when she was seven or something. She flies like a fucking vigilante and kicks his ass. And her only mistake is not using her superhero magic enough. This Mulan is impeccable. It’s perfect. And she is the chosen one who will save China, simply because she is perfect. Or woman, I have no patience to decipher this film.

No, no, no, no, no, no, Disney! She’s nothing special. She is a reluctant and anxious girl who goes to war because she performs a selfless act. She’s trying to save her sick father from certain death. And she studies army bases like everyone else in the army. Through daring training, perseverance, willfulness and text I make you a man of substance. Which I appreciate, although I have a deep contempt for musicals.

I was ready to look through the prism of the fact that Mushu and Cricket are characters that we miss a lot in a live remake. Oh, come on! You’re setting a bad example. Basically, you tell little girls that they are perfect and flawless, and nothing can go wrong. They don’t have to improve themselves, train as a team or even improve what they do. Oh, and men don’t want them either. It’s bullshit, but it’s another job, I guess. It is the perfect recipe for disaster, because you condemn him to failure because of that way of thinking. Instead of telling them to work hard and invest in themselves, all they have to do is demand to be treated like the cursed Messiah.

Because that’s all the new Mulan is. She doesn’t need advice. No teamwork. No, she’s the best and anyone can suck it. Remember the training break in the 1998 animated film? Nobody (not even Mulan) could walk a meter above the beam. But when she put her mind inside and applied her knowledge, she did. It took a while, but she did it. A terrible soldier became, I dare say, later an excellent soldier defending China.–.jpg

The new Mulan may have a Forza or some kind of superpower, but it is not even the hundredth digit of the old Mulan. From the point of view of recognition, entertainment and simple importance of the gaze. And her name’s in the headline, so you better believe she’s in every goddamn scene.

Eww. It’s not mine. I hate the new Mulan and I’ll probably hate every new Disney character in future show remakes. I know what’s gonna happen, and I don’t like it. I’m sorry. I’m not sorry.

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